Oh Father Where Art Thou?

     I'm having daddy issues. No, no, not like that. Host dad issues, and they're really not issues, more like misunderstandings. I mean this quite literally too, I sincerely can not understand him. For starters, he has a speech impediment where he can neither pronouns his "s" nor his "r" sounds- making 50% of his words complete gibberish. This, combined with the Chilean accent and slang makes talking to him in a word, baffling. What I can piece together is this:
1) He thinks American girls look like boys and are too thin and need to put more meat on their bones. Then again, he's also obese so everyone is thin in comparison...
2) Every weekend he goes out to the casino and wins every time. But how? Well I asked the same thing, and in listening to his response I couldn't figure out what the word "cahnio" meant. He was saying "casino", so it's still a mystery.
3) He's in a motorcycle club. I thought I mis-heard him but he made the vroom-vroom hand motions of a motor bike... So, I actually understood that one- it was only the disbelief of it that made me question him.

        He's quite the clown, and despite the language barrier and blood relation- one thing remains the same despite culture differences. Fathers still love to give their daughters a hard time. He is relentless with my host sister about her pololo (who has a unibrow), and the clothes she wears (which usually have an element of sparkle.)
      With me, he pretends to have a "draw" (a la John Wayne) whenever I see him. Swiftly he'll pull his invisible gun from his invisible hip holster, on occasion shout "Whiskey", and shoot me down. When I asked him why, he replied with some yadda-yadda I didn't understand. But maybe even if I did, it wouldn't have made much of a difference, because from what I can tell sometimes we like to joke around just for the sake of joking. And that's something I can always understand.